I am now reading C.G. Jung's Answer to Job. I read its excerpts a few years ago and felt very much perplexed so the book had always been on my mind these years...
An encounter to a book is often mysterious. I happen to find a right book at the right time. Recently, I happened to pick up the complete volumes of History of Greek Philosophy from Beijing's People's University in the garbage which I was in charge of cleaning. Then I found in another pile of garbage the Chinese translation of Catholic Bible a few days later. But so what?
Actually, I have been studying about Gnostics, the ancient mystical heretic Christians these days and very much interested in the lost goddess named Sophia, who had a very important role in Gnosticism. In order to know Sophia better, the knowledge of Greek philosophy (which I could only studied in dreams or completely distracted by a girl in a cheerleader uniform always sitting in front of me at a university lecture hall) is vital and she is manifested in Apocryphal books of wisdom, which are absent from the Protestant Bible, the Bible readily available at an ordinary bookstore. So two persons threw away right books for me at the right time. Very interesting...
And I am delighted to see Sophia mentioned in Jung's Answer to Job. And now I now know why I happened to find this book at a shelf of a bookstore which I rarely visit. Now I read this again because I am ready now. If I had no knowledge on Gnosticism, I would end up perplexed again but now I see an ancient mystery reveal itself to me because I have at least some idea about the lost sect. So again, I've met the right book at a right time.
Considering these things, I simply cannot help myself from feeling there certainly is the guidance that is given by Sophia, who manifests herself with a mischievous character quite much like Midori in Murakami's Norwegian Wood or Sailor Mercury.... (blush)
2006年3月30日木曜日
2006年3月29日水曜日
Embrace Ego and Leave It Behind
Buddhists say that ego is the source of all sufferings.
I am familiar with this because I was born and grew up in Japan, a country where the majority of people identify themselves as Buddhists. And this idea permeated throughout the primary and middle school education. So it is in my blood and bones.
So am I free from suffering? Not at all!
I think this theory itself is largely correct. But brutal suppression of ego never makes a happy person.
Suppression simply makes ego angrier and even stronger. It would make a person very angry. It also would make a person very apathetic. Anyway, making ego angrier will never help us remove sufferings.
From my experience, giving attention to and affirmation of the self work much better than suppression of ego. Just as we would not strongly demand food when we are full, we would not demand much attention when we receive due respect. So I believe we can satisfy our ego by paying attention to it and kindly embracing it.
When our ego is satisfied and calms down, we can quietly leave it behind. I wish I had known it long before but it's still not too late...
I am familiar with this because I was born and grew up in Japan, a country where the majority of people identify themselves as Buddhists. And this idea permeated throughout the primary and middle school education. So it is in my blood and bones.
So am I free from suffering? Not at all!
I think this theory itself is largely correct. But brutal suppression of ego never makes a happy person.
Suppression simply makes ego angrier and even stronger. It would make a person very angry. It also would make a person very apathetic. Anyway, making ego angrier will never help us remove sufferings.
From my experience, giving attention to and affirmation of the self work much better than suppression of ego. Just as we would not strongly demand food when we are full, we would not demand much attention when we receive due respect. So I believe we can satisfy our ego by paying attention to it and kindly embracing it.
When our ego is satisfied and calms down, we can quietly leave it behind. I wish I had known it long before but it's still not too late...
2006年3月28日火曜日
Horrible but Very Happy
My junior high school days were indeed horrible.
I was in a fascist school that regularly checked the colours of girls' panties and have boys head shaved. Teachers heavily discouraged students to think independently and critically because thinking should be done by adults.
My entire body was covered with rash and I always looked as if I'd been raided by a swarm of bees.
My entire face was covered with pimples. Indeed, I didn't want to be photographed because I would later see a monster.
I was oppressed and ugly. So those days were indeed horrible...
But I was very happy.
Because I was unhappy I had a hope.
And this hope made me act like a revolutionary.
So some adults called me Red or a Commie. But it proved my intelligence! In the early 1980s, while Japanese high school dropouts joined Neo-fascist organisations or became gangsters, rebellious young intellectuals were still attracted by Socialism.
So I became a dissident! Very cool, huh? It gave me a big sense of mission. I became a fighter of people's liberation!
That made me very bold and courageous. So girls liked me even though I was awfully ugly.
Life is indeed a curious thing. Frankly speaking, I am very much surprised by my own ability to feel very happy under adversity. Maybe I still have it...
I was in a fascist school that regularly checked the colours of girls' panties and have boys head shaved. Teachers heavily discouraged students to think independently and critically because thinking should be done by adults.
My entire body was covered with rash and I always looked as if I'd been raided by a swarm of bees.
My entire face was covered with pimples. Indeed, I didn't want to be photographed because I would later see a monster.
I was oppressed and ugly. So those days were indeed horrible...
But I was very happy.
Because I was unhappy I had a hope.
And this hope made me act like a revolutionary.
So some adults called me Red or a Commie. But it proved my intelligence! In the early 1980s, while Japanese high school dropouts joined Neo-fascist organisations or became gangsters, rebellious young intellectuals were still attracted by Socialism.
So I became a dissident! Very cool, huh? It gave me a big sense of mission. I became a fighter of people's liberation!
That made me very bold and courageous. So girls liked me even though I was awfully ugly.
Life is indeed a curious thing. Frankly speaking, I am very much surprised by my own ability to feel very happy under adversity. Maybe I still have it...
2006年3月27日月曜日
When Two Sets of Eyes Become One
When her eyes meet her eyes,
She is in him and he is in her.
When the world around them falls away,
She melts into him and so does he.
Then time stops and boundary between the two
Falls away just like the world around them.
When two sets of eyes become one,
They see God within them.
When world around them falls away,
There emerges the foretaste of eternity.
Now they are in the classroom of Love 101.
They'll learn helluvalot from their oness.
When you meet such eyes,
It's the entrance of your own holiness.
That in turn makes everyone holy.
If you've already met such eyes,
Cherish these and let the seed of love in two
Grow into a big tree of Godly love.
She is in him and he is in her.
When the world around them falls away,
She melts into him and so does he.
Then time stops and boundary between the two
Falls away just like the world around them.
When two sets of eyes become one,
They see God within them.
When world around them falls away,
There emerges the foretaste of eternity.
Now they are in the classroom of Love 101.
They'll learn helluvalot from their oness.
When you meet such eyes,
It's the entrance of your own holiness.
That in turn makes everyone holy.
If you've already met such eyes,
Cherish these and let the seed of love in two
Grow into a big tree of Godly love.
2006年3月26日日曜日
Nose Picking by a Dream Girl
I saw a very weird dream during a nap today.
I seemed to be lying on the floor of a living room of someone's house. I was so sleepy, probably because I drank and ate too much at a party. I saw there were a few other persons also lying on the floor. Maybe they were full and drunk, too.
Then a girl, who was lying close to me woke up and smiled at me. She was my dream girl (looked somewhat like Gigi Leung five years ago) and her smile was so mischevously sweet. Then she moved up to me and touched my cheeks. I thought (and hoped) she'd kiss me. I knew she was my anima and now she was going to reward me with a kiss for my efforts to improve the communication with her...
But she started picking my nose!
Maybe I picked my nose while sleeping. But it was my dream girl who did the picking. This dream is so enigmatic that I feel it'll take while before I decode the meaning...
Well, I once saw my dream girl picking her nose.
She was a young soldier of the People's Liberation Army. She was so boyishly cute that I could not help myself from staring her. She stare me back, smiling but then she started picking her nose. I'll remember her forever. Yes, because of picking nose...
I seemed to be lying on the floor of a living room of someone's house. I was so sleepy, probably because I drank and ate too much at a party. I saw there were a few other persons also lying on the floor. Maybe they were full and drunk, too.
Then a girl, who was lying close to me woke up and smiled at me. She was my dream girl (looked somewhat like Gigi Leung five years ago) and her smile was so mischevously sweet. Then she moved up to me and touched my cheeks. I thought (and hoped) she'd kiss me. I knew she was my anima and now she was going to reward me with a kiss for my efforts to improve the communication with her...
But she started picking my nose!
Maybe I picked my nose while sleeping. But it was my dream girl who did the picking. This dream is so enigmatic that I feel it'll take while before I decode the meaning...
Well, I once saw my dream girl picking her nose.
She was a young soldier of the People's Liberation Army. She was so boyishly cute that I could not help myself from staring her. She stare me back, smiling but then she started picking her nose. I'll remember her forever. Yes, because of picking nose...
2006年3月25日土曜日
Clever Dumb and Dumber
Have you really considered how many opportunities you have had to gladden yourself, and how many of them you have refused?
- A Course In Miracles, Text, Chapt. 4, IV, Paragraph 8
Actually, we often choose to put ourselves in misfortunes, just like the end of a Jim Carrey movie Dumb and Dumber. Well, they are somewhat clever because they don't go on grunting about their misfortune created by their refusal. We can learn from them...
- A Course In Miracles, Text, Chapt. 4, IV, Paragraph 8
Actually, we often choose to put ourselves in misfortunes, just like the end of a Jim Carrey movie Dumb and Dumber. Well, they are somewhat clever because they don't go on grunting about their misfortune created by their refusal. We can learn from them...
2006年3月24日金曜日
Diffuse the Bomb of Fear with a Bad Joke!
Don't like what you see?
Then make it into a bad joke
And laugh it away.
It works much better
Than closing your eyes.
Laughing at a bad joke can
Bring life back to you
And diffuse the bomb of fear.
When you give a new interpretation
To the world in front of your eyes,
You become aware that
You can renew the world
Into what you can like.
It allows you to live in the Heaven
Even before you die.
Because it makes you aware that
You are the Creator of the world
Who can also redeem it at will.
Then make it into a bad joke
And laugh it away.
It works much better
Than closing your eyes.
Laughing at a bad joke can
Bring life back to you
And diffuse the bomb of fear.
When you give a new interpretation
To the world in front of your eyes,
You become aware that
You can renew the world
Into what you can like.
It allows you to live in the Heaven
Even before you die.
Because it makes you aware that
You are the Creator of the world
Who can also redeem it at will.
2006年3月23日木曜日
A Fun Funeral
I happened to watch Adam Sandler’s Little Nicky last night on the cable. And that reminded me of my mother-in-law’s funeral in the As she died peacefully at the age 80 (according to the traditional counting), her week-long funeral was like a celebration. Her coffin was painted gold and had Christmas tree lights blinking over it. It looked very awkward (and very funny) to me but I did know that it meant glory of longevity. Anyway, Theravada Buddhists love glittering glory and often represent it by Christmas tree lights…
Her funeral seemed to be a rare occasion of communal entertainment for all the villagers. Two pigs and a cow were slaughtered for the feast. Women joyfully cooked, chatted and ate endlessly, while men drank almost endlessly. Everyone except my wife (who had to pay for all of this) and I (who could neither drink, eat spicy food nor speak the Lao language) was happy. Every night from midnight to dawn, they played Thai dance music through a loudspeaker. I guess it was the message to the deceased that everyone was fine and she could this world without worry… I felt it was so nice that I started to hope people would throw a wild party after my death.
And after a week of feast, they watched more than a few movies in the dried rice paddy to wrap up the funeral. I remember one of my sisters-in-law rented action movies from
But it was fine. The movie that made fun of the heaviness of life and death might be quite appropriate for everyone before going back to life from a long funeral. Well, I guess my mischievous mother-in-law would have liked this movie…
After we came back to my mother-in-law’s home from her cremation (48-hour slow grilling using charcoal), one of the neighbours said something bad about her. Then a strong wind came out of blue and blew his cap away. He was just scared out of h-ll. Everyone knew that wind was my mother-in-law’s goodbye. I loved her playful way of leaving this world…
2006年3月22日水曜日
Inter-esse, Inter-be, Interest
The origin of interest: Latin inter-esse 'to be in or among.'
If you are suffering because you cannot
Get involved in what's important to you,
Put it among what you are interested in.
Everything in the world is somehow connected
So you'll find something related to what you like.
If you feel you cannot get involved in
Something very important to you,
Find a connection between you and it.
You'll soon find more and more connections
And find yourself living in a web of interest.
Everything has something to do with you.
Live the life of Interbeing!
2006年3月21日火曜日
Wisdom Seen in Sailor Mercury
I have no idea why but I recently see Sailor Mercury, one of the characters in Japanese cartoon Sailor Moon very often. On the Net and on the street and even in the garbage I pick, I found her pictures. It is quite strange that I see her often now in 2006. Sailor Moon should already be a history. And I didn’t really watch the series, either. I have known it only as a social phenomenon…
Just a few days ago, I found a pile of anime trading cards dumped in one of the refuge rooms that I was in charge of. And Sailor Mercury was on the top of the pile. As I felt a bit disturbed about my frequent encountering to her, I put all these cards into a plastic bag and stirred them, wishing she’d mix into other cards. But she stayed on the top. So I stirred the cards again. But she still refused to go down. So I picked the card up and slipped it into my pocket.
Well, frankly speaking, I find Sailor Mercury cute. Her somewhat boyish appearance is very close to my archetypal dream girl. So I am not surprised at all if she is manifestation of my anima. And I remember that she is the most intelligent of the Sailor Fighters. Then it is very close to my anima figure that I privately call Sophie (Wisdom). In addition, Mercury is the Roman god of storytelling! Wah, just a few minutes pondering solved much of the mystery…
So now I think my anima, my Inner Guide to Wisdom now tries to communicate with me through the appearance of Sailor Mercury, a figure close to my archetypal girl friend. Well, I have been tired and have found it quite difficult to write a poem or a story these days. I guess it has come from my lack of attention to my anima so she has tried to draw my attention with pretty face and a sexy costume! Well, it's nice but she’s acted in a way that makes a middle aged man (me) blush...
2006年3月20日月曜日
My Most Favourite Verses from ACIM
How can you who are so holy suffer? All your past except its beauty is gone, nothing is left but a blessing. It have saved all your kindness and every loving thought you ever had. I (Jesus) have purified them of the errors that hid their light, and kept the for you in their own perfect radiance. They are beyond destruction and beyond guilt. They came from the Holy Spirit within you, and we know what God creates is eternal.
- A Course In Miracles, Text, Ch 5, V, Paragraph 8, Verses 1-5
- A Course In Miracles, Text, Ch 5, V, Paragraph 8, Verses 1-5
2006年3月19日日曜日
Choose Your Emotions
I am responsible for what I see.
I choose the feelings I experience, and I decide
upon the goal I would achieve.
And everything that seems to happen to me
I ask for, and receive as I asked.
- A Course In Miracles (Text Ch. 21, II, Paragraph 2, Verses 3-5)
Sounds strange? But when you have unwanted emotions, just stand back, have a panoramic view, take a very deep breath. It will make it easier for you to choose the emotions you feel. It is not control but a choice, which works better.
I choose the feelings I experience, and I decide
upon the goal I would achieve.
And everything that seems to happen to me
I ask for, and receive as I asked.
- A Course In Miracles (Text Ch. 21, II, Paragraph 2, Verses 3-5)
Sounds strange? But when you have unwanted emotions, just stand back, have a panoramic view, take a very deep breath. It will make it easier for you to choose the emotions you feel. It is not control but a choice, which works better.
2006年3月18日土曜日
Thank You for Visiting!
This blog space has had at least one visitor from all six continents of the world this week!
Thank you for visiting Alaqa!
The Source of All Evil?
When my teacher said that I was a super villain, the source of all evil, I wished it'd really been so.
Where did my pain come from?
Where did the whole world's pain come from?
If I'd been really a source of all evil, I could've removed all sufferings of myself and this world's somehow. Just by turning all my evil super power to something good, I could've made everyone happy...
I really wished I'd been a super villain. Such an influential super bad guy's repentance could've cleansed the sin of the whole world.
But unfortunately I had no such a superpower. Now I am on the way of my own healing by affirming that I am not evil. I hope I can heal the teacher who himself had enough suffering to label a timid pre-teen child the source of all evil.
I now want to free myself from the illusion of my evilness, so that I can help the world to free itself.
Where did my pain come from?
Where did the whole world's pain come from?
If I'd been really a source of all evil, I could've removed all sufferings of myself and this world's somehow. Just by turning all my evil super power to something good, I could've made everyone happy...
I really wished I'd been a super villain. Such an influential super bad guy's repentance could've cleansed the sin of the whole world.
But unfortunately I had no such a superpower. Now I am on the way of my own healing by affirming that I am not evil. I hope I can heal the teacher who himself had enough suffering to label a timid pre-teen child the source of all evil.
I now want to free myself from the illusion of my evilness, so that I can help the world to free itself.
2006年3月17日金曜日
Too Strong to Let Go
If someone close to you abuses himself,
Kindly support him.
He is not weak at all.
Actually, he's too strong to let go of the pain
That comes from from anger, sorrow or loss...
He's actually strong enough
To endure his abuse on himself.
If this strength is redirected,
He'll do an excellent job.
Punishment is not what he needs.
What he need is your reminder
That he still has resources
To feel happy and make you happy.
You can help him heal this way...
Kindly support him.
He is not weak at all.
Actually, he's too strong to let go of the pain
That comes from from anger, sorrow or loss...
He's actually strong enough
To endure his abuse on himself.
If this strength is redirected,
He'll do an excellent job.
Punishment is not what he needs.
What he need is your reminder
That he still has resources
To feel happy and make you happy.
You can help him heal this way...
2006年3月16日木曜日
Don't Underestimate the Power of Earthly Love
Please don't underestimate
The power of earthly love.
Finding beauty in another
Ordinary human being is
Indeed one of everyman's
Windows opened to holiness.
Please don't vilify
The power of earthly love.
Desire to be one with another
Ordinary human being is
Indeed everyman's door to
The quests of overcomimg differences.
Let's celebrate
The power of earthly love!
And allow this foretaste of the Heaven
To grow into the seed of holiness
In everyone's heart.
Alaqa's Recommendation: Cultivating the Mind of Love by Ven. Thich Nhat Hanh. It is the Zen master's memoir of first love and about how the earthly love can grow into something holy...
一行禪師親自所講述的初戀故事是被收錄於『與生命相約』(台北‧橡樹林2002年 ISBN986-7884-02-7)的。
The power of earthly love.
Finding beauty in another
Ordinary human being is
Indeed one of everyman's
Windows opened to holiness.
Please don't vilify
The power of earthly love.
Desire to be one with another
Ordinary human being is
Indeed everyman's door to
The quests of overcomimg differences.
Let's celebrate
The power of earthly love!
And allow this foretaste of the Heaven
To grow into the seed of holiness
In everyone's heart.
Alaqa's Recommendation: Cultivating the Mind of Love by Ven. Thich Nhat Hanh. It is the Zen master's memoir of first love and about how the earthly love can grow into something holy...
一行禪師親自所講述的初戀故事是被收錄於『與生命相約』(台北‧橡樹林2002年 ISBN986-7884-02-7)的。
Tibetan Medicine (3) - Initiation
It says "slightly fishy." Slightly???
After I opened the plastic capsule of Bu Shen Wan, I immediately knew why its packaging was so excessive, and why a cardboard box full of these balls (more than 80!) was thrown away.
As I removed thin aluminum foil from the sticky brownish ball, I felt as if I'd smelled raw sewage. It was so revolting that neither Norwegian lutefisk, Laotian pa daek, Japanese kusaya, even Chinese smelly tofu, nor any stinky food you could name seemed to be no match to Bu Shen Wan.
Well, then I had to put this sewage-flavoured ball in my mouth. For it was large enough to choke a horse, I decided to chopping it up in small pieces and gulp down with warm water. While chopping, overwhelmed with the odour, I had teary eyes as if I had been slicing an onion.
When I put those pieces into my mouth, I felt as if I had taken a bite of a sewage system. More tears came out of my eyes and my throat and stomach tried with all their might to prevent the inflow of this alien object.
But why is it so stinky?
I checked the ingredients of the medicine and felt another revolt in my stomach. It was made of testicles of horse, bull and ram, penises of donkey and deer, and some common Chinese herbs.
However, I already took the fourth doze of Bu Shen Wan last night. Even though I have to fight myself while taking it, it is so effective (especially for fatigue) that I feel like taking it again.
But I still need quite a lot of psychological preparation before taking it. It is quite much like asking a boss for a pay raise... And I am sick enough to do it every night. Well, I am sick so I need medicine, right? Please wish me get well soon!
2006年3月15日水曜日
Time's Up for Thinking
When you still feel lost
Even after thousands of thoughts,
Time's already up for thinking.
More thinking only ends up
More question marks hovering
In your mind like noisy flies.
So when you still feel lost
Even after thousands of thoughts,
It's time to let the Holy spirit guide you.
Less thoughts makes you hear
Her voices much more clearly.
So close your eyes and count your breaths.
When you still feel lost
Even after thousands of thoughts,
It's time to listen to small voice
That comes deep inside your heart.
Tibetan Medicine (2) - Ecologist's Nightmare?
The packaging of this medicine is simply excessive. It comes in a box of a size bit larger than the modem used roughly ten years ago. In that box, there are eight small boxes of the size a bit smaller than a box of two golf balls. Then in each of smaller box, there is one ball of medicine placed in a plastic container. In such a big box, there are only eight balls of medicine that are smaller than ping pong balls. It should be an ecologist's nightmare. (But I soon discovered why.)
Anyway, the kidney medicine is highly prized in China as the people here think that kidney function affects sex a lot. So this Bu Shen Wan may be used as a gift (or bribe) to an important person... From the package, I can see it is luxrious medicine. Anyway, a luxury item should be in a ridiculously excessive packaging, and it is particularly true in this part of the world.
Although I have no sex problem (actually I want to cool myself down a bit), I have had kidney problems since I was a child. So when I picked up a cardboard box full of this medicine in a refuge room, I decided to take it.
When I took the first ball of Bu Shen Wan, I felt as if I had been in some kind of tribal initiation... It is definitely not as easy as gulping some aspirin pills. I will tell you about this initiation tomorrow.
2006年3月14日火曜日
Tibetan Medicine (1) - Discovery
I have been taking the most horrible and weird medicine I have ever experienced in my lifetime. I recently found a cardboard box full of that medicine in a pile of garbage I was cleaning up. Well, I do not recommend you take medicine that someone has thrown away. But it was the kind of medicine I wanted and it had more than half a year before expiry...
It is called Bu Shen Wan or "Kidney Replenishment Ball" made in Ningxia Hui Autonomous Region, China. As this medicine's has a bilingual - Tibetan and Chinese - package, its recipe should be of the Tibetan origin, even though Ningxia is actually quite far from Tibet.
Tibetan medicine. Exotic isn't it? Tibet has a long tradition of its own medicine developed on the basis of Indian medicine and it has been quite popular in China these days. Perhaps, some Han Chinese accept Tibetan medicine in the same way as some Westerners try Chinese medicine for persistent chronic disease...
Well, as some of the most precious herbs for Chinese medicine come from Tibet, it could be much easier for Han to try Tibetan medicine than Westerners do bitter and weird Chinese potion.
I will tell you more about this mysterious medicine tomorrow again...
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